Just Few Questions

Why would you expect someone to confess to you if you yourself don't have the courage to do so?

How would you know what it means without even asking?

How can you do that - assume and conclude like as if you are the only one to consider?

How can you act like a girl, expecting someone to show you what you want to see?

And how can you not be so patient, courageous and man enough to understand what is going on?

Just a few questions I would like to throw. It's annoying how these things go wrong especially when I didn't (I think) even do anything.

If you think these questions are not for you, then fine I'm done with this.

LSS - Dahil Ikaw

Yea I know it's ancient now. lol but still nice :))
______________________________________
Sa piling ba niya ikaw ay
May lungkot na nararamdaman
Damdamin mo ba'y hindi maintindihan
At sa tuwing ako ang
Nasa iyong isipan
May nakita ka ba na ibang kasiyahan
Refrain:
Nandito lang ako
Naghihintay sa iyo
Na mapansin ang aking damdamin
Na para lang sa iyo (oohh...oohhh...)

Chorus 1:
Dahil ikaw ang sigaw ng puso ko
Ikaw ang nasa isip ko
Ang nais ko ay malaman mo
Na ikaw ang tanging pangarap ng buhay
Pag-ibig ko sa iyo ibibigay
Nais ko ay malaman mo (wooh...woooh...wooh...)
Na mahal kita
Sa piling ba niya ikaw ay
May sakit na nararamdaman
Damdamin mo ba ay sinasaktan
At sa tuwing ako ang
Nasa iyong panaginip
Na tayong dalawa masayang magkapiling

(repeat refrain & chorus 1)

Sana'y pagbigyan ang nadaramang ito
Sana masabi mo na mahal mo rin ako

Chorus 2:
Dahil ikaw ang sigaw ng puso ko
Ikaw ang nasa isip ko
Ang nais ko ay malaman mo
Na ikaw ang tanging pangarap ng buhay
Pag-ibig ko sa iyo ibibigay
Nais ko ay malaman mo (wooh...woooh...wooh...)
Na mahal kita (ikaw ang sigaw ng puso)
Na mahal kita (ikaw ang nasa isip ko)
Na mahal kita (ikaw ang sigaw ng puso)
Na mahal kita (ikaw ang nasa isip ko)

What can I say

It's funny. Something happened and I just have been myself once again, crazy and irrational. I told myself I wouldn't care whatever the truth is. What a hypocrite am I? First, I should have ignored it if I really don't care. It's so annoying. I betrayed myself. Second, I shouldn't look if I want to pretend that I really don't care. GRRR. But why am I doing this? I'm just being irrational. So, once again, I just dropped it. I can't understand my thinking and that's why no one can tell what I'm up to. And to end all this conflict within myself, I just let it pass. Anyway, I'm really sorry.

The pressure is on me. It's massive that I couldn't even focus on what I'm supposed to be doing. I should finish loads of sheets in Math, Physics and Chemistry. I have to have constant revision in everything otherwise I'm going to lose everything. I have to practice Economics. I have to finish writing my speech by Monday. How can I handle all these? I really want to do good. But what if my body couldn't respond to the best of my ability? I don't know.

imy

I couldn't care less

Exams

It is a dreadful night for me. I feel like I have to write everything. lol

I have Chemistry, Physics and Economics to revise on. It's all hard subjects and I need to dedicate time in each of those. I have to have balance in everything. Otherwise, it would be nothing. My good mark will be pulled down by the crap one.

I have three exams in Math. This time, I have to do well in each and every test, even in those that doesn't even count towards my HSC. My teacher said that we are REQUIRED to do well. Otherwise, we are not worthy of accelerating. Ouch.

I have a speech in English for our half-yearly. It is ok for me. Delivery would be chicken wings but the writing would be hard. Good luck 3z (:

I'm taking the knowledge test tomorrow. I'm excited to get the licence. I'm not going to learn how to drive though. Maybe some other time, when I'm ready (:

I wish everything will go well. Of course I have to put effort into everything. AND OH!!! I'm going to Adelaide on July 2. ((: I'm excited ((: Wii!!

..if ever i'm getting it the right way, you are special indeed (: just thought everyone should see the song. it's nice (:

Driving

Why do people must learn how to drive? It is like a part of one's life to follow the same steps as everyone else - L's, P's, Full. Why can't people have a choice not to? I mean, why should everyone in the legal age get a driver's licence? Why can't one survive without knowing how to run a mobile car? It's so annoying. Surely, someone will say that everyone has a choice to say 'No'. But do you think he will survive? NO. lol. One SHOULD. It is part of 'independence'.

I wish I can just hire a driver all my life. I don't want to drive. I'm scared of putting my life on risk, as well as other people's. It is so frightening.

I always think of what they always say:

'The road is the stairway to heaven...'

Creepy, it is.

01.05.09

Two weeks of Term 2 has passed and so many things happened along the way. I may have done the right thing, or the opposite. I'm not sure of everything. I'm lost.

My Math is going really good. I'm almost satisfied with the marks I'm getting. Meaning, I've worked hard for them. I did my best and the feeling is just so indescribable.

My English hasn't gone any better. I think it even becomes worse after each time. It's a good thing that I wasn't advised to drop Advanced or else I don't know how to swallow the embarrassment and of course the self-disappointment. I'm just right, a normal Advanced student. I'm actually near the bottom. I came 41st out of 84 students. I told you I'm just normal, or average rather.

Physics is interesting. But I don't think I'm getting the marks I really want. I know I can do it. But why don't I? It is weird. How do I fight myself? I consider 2 contradicting thoughts, which I both accept as right. This is how irrational I am. I know.

Chemistry is the same. I can't elaborate how I used to love this subject. This is my first love. This is everything I used to focus on. I guess I lost the track now. I can't understand myself. No wonder other people can't read me nowadays. I'm too confusing, annoying.

Economics became one of my loved subjects. It's natural. I don't have to stay up late or to exert extra effort to do well in it. I enjoy doing everything about Economics which I think is the reason why I don't consider any work as 'extra'. Everything is just right. Amazing :)

My school life is a cycle. Everything is rolling and keeps on coming back. It's like as if history repeats itself. I don't learn from my past mistakes. I keep on doing the same thing every time. But I'm not going to give up. I know I can do it. :))

Let's just keep it this way. I don't want to add something that may or may not offend someone in any sense and in any case. Sometimes, things go wrong even before it start moving. It's just up to me to mend everything I wrecked.

What can I do now to make things better?